Stuff

My husband and I have a "retirement plan".  We actually have a name for it; It's called the Holiday Inn Retirement Plan. We have been discussing different aspects of this plan for a couple of months now. Basically it came about like this.
We stayed a night in a hotel. A really nice one with a convention center in it and this really cool paisley carpet in the halls. It had beautiful furniture; a full size Murphy bed in the living room, with a leather couch and big tv. The other room had a huge soft bed and big window. I could live here,  I thought to myself. Nice granite sinks, really cool shower. Why not? So my husband and I began to talk about it. He travels for a living, so really we could live anywhere. I did the math, and came up with numbers that would actually almost work. A couple of big snags; We would have to sell our house and what to do with our dogs. It's not like we would be leaving any time soon. But we talked about it like we were leaving tomorrow. A life of ease. Leave behind housework, property taxes, and driving 140 miles to the airport every week. No more house remodeling or worrying about that sagging gutter on the roof. Included in our "mortgage" would be gym, pool, cable and housekeeping.
True we would have to virtually get rid of everything. I did a mental checklist of almost everything I owned. In my mind I let go of most of it. We could have a huge yard sale. Sell the couches, tv, dishes, furniture. We would have to store a few things, things I inherited from my grandparents, such as my kitchen table, and some of my dishes. I could picture myself in this new life. And I liked the thought of it.
I continued in these thoughts for some time, probably two or three months. This morning as I was getting ready for church and thinking about all these things, the Lord spoke. I heard him clearly interrupt me in the middle of my pleasant musings "You would give all this up for pleasure. Would you give it up for me?" 
Ouch.
I wanted to shy away from that question. But He persisted. "Would you give all this up if I asked you to? With no promise of pleasure to gain?"
"Umm...wow...Lord I have to be honest. I don't know."  I was shocked by my own thoughts. Truthfully I don't want to give up my stuff with no promise of gain. No fun. No pleasure.
At that split second I understood, I mean really understood, what Jesus meant when He said "Anyone who loves their life will lose it, while anyone who hates their life in this world will keep it for eternal life." (John 12:25)
If I am not willing to give up what He asks me to give up, whether it is stuff, or certain relationships, or dollars, anything, that I am unwilling to part with comes between me and my Saviour. It is sin.
That is painful. I love my stuff. What is more painful is that I am completely willing to give it up to live a life of ease. But I am reluctant to give it up for the Lord who has given His life for me. Saved me. Rescued me. Has promised me eternal life.
These are difficult words to come to grips with. I can't say it enough. I love my stuff. But it's not eternal. It will all eventually be lost, broken, torn up, thrown away, or burned when the world passes away.
Does this mean that I am selling everything tomorrow? No. God didn't ask me to do that. He just asked if I was willing. He touched a tender spot. I love my stuff. But do I love Him more?
"God I ask forgiveness for loving lifeless stuff more than you. I have to be honest and tell you this is hard for me. Help me to be willing to do whatever you ask of me, no matter what it is, so that nothing...nothing comes between us. So that I can gain eternally. Amen.