November 18.

 It's not been great today, Lord. Things have been spoken when they shouldn't have, things that should have been said were withheld. There have been anger, tears, sadness, despair, heartbreak, and feelings of loss and disappointment. I thank you, though, that at the end of the day, when all is silent, when the talk shows cease, and the tv is turned off, and the phones are put away for the night, that I can still hear your still small voice calling me to the foot of the cross. There I can find the peace I have been seeking all day long. There I can find and give forgiveness. There I can find the goodness and kindness I have been lacking. There I can receive the love I have so desperately needed today. There I can find hope to keep me going, if I keep my gaze fixed on you. 

Today my Psalm, and it is my very favorite Psalm, is verse 126. I love this one because I lived it. Twice. Once in Salinas, it was my cry, and when we came home, my joy. When the Mr. was sick, it was also my cry, and again, my delight and joy, when we came home. Now it is my prayer again. What you did before, do again. Bring streams of water to the Negev, to the desert, and joy so wonderful that it is like we dream. 

When the Lord brought back the captives (who returned) from Zion, we were like those who dream (it seemed so unreal). Then were our mouths filled with laughter, and our tongues with singing. Then they said among the nations, The Lord has done great things for them. The Lord has done great things for us! We are glad! Turn to freedom our captivity and restore our fortunes, O Lord, as the streams in the South (the Negev) are restored by the torrents. 

They who sow in tears shall reap in joy and singing. He who goes forth bearing seed and weeping at needing his precious supply of grain for sowing shall doubtless come again with rejoicing, bringing his sheaves with him. 

Thank you, Jesus, that when I have had a terrible, terrible day, a day in which everything has gone wrong, I can find my refuge in you. You will never fail me.