jAnUaRy 14

And then I was ill. For five days I rotated between bed and chair, barely getting up to do anything. The kids (well, not kids, 31 and 27) took over taking out the dog and taking care of the house. We ordered out almost every day. There was very little cooking going on. The Mr. took good care of me. I was, however, very sad that all that food I cooked would now not be able to be taken to Dad's house. I wavered between maybe it would be Ok, and probably not, to take food I had prepared while I was sick to a sick man's house. In the end it was a no. If it was a normal person I think it would have been Ok, but being that he is on Chemo, with an impaired immune system, best not to take any chances. I called him and spoke to him about it, and we decided that I would come to his house when I am better and make a few things there, things he has requested (no FAT noodles were mentioned). Meanwhile I have a whole freezer full of homemade TV dinners and a gold mine of sausage balls that will most certainly be enjoyed by this family. And by this family I mean ME. 

I looked at the calendar today and absolutely could not believe that we are almost halfway through the month. Didn't we just have Christmas? New Year's? And now it's almost my birthday. I have been told by the Mr. not to buy myself anything, because the "kids" have already put their heads together and bought something for me. 

So I am fully back to normal today. I allowed myself yesterday to get it all out of my system, and spent the day watching You tube videos. Late in the evening I came across a video of a Christian artist who is an encourager to other Christian artists, to step out and do the art. All of a sudden while he was talking, something began rising in me. I began to get excited, because I had another one of my great ideas. I want to paint. I always want to paint, but I lack good ideas. But as I was sitting there, not really listening to him, it occurred to me that I DO have some good ideas. I would like to paint some small sketches, not really full paintings, of my good memories of childhood. I don't know if I have the skillset, or if this is just a pipe dream, but I have some really great memories that I would like to put to paper. Maybe I can consult some old photos, too. 

But first, I must finish the paint-by-number that I started more than four years ago. I am close to the finish line and I want to get it done and framed. I was working on it last week and set it on top of the dresser and then came in to find that the Mr. had set some clothes on top of it. My bad for leaving it on the dresser, his bad for not putting his clothes away properly. It was in no way harmed, but I am afraid if I don't get it done something is going to happen to it. It's only cardboard and cheap paint, and it is not very good close up, but it represents a lot to me. Memories of working on it while the Mr. was sick, and then on transplant day it was how I buried myself so I wouldn't think about how things were going. I remember sitting at the hotel room table, phone beside me, scared out of my mind, and how shaky my hands were that day, as I held the paintbrush. Then recovery time in the hotel and the four years since. It's time to finish. 

So today the plan is to clean up the office and get started on finishing that painting so I can put my other ideas to work. I must say it is a wonderful thing to have a mind always churning with new ideas. 

Happy birthday to my beautiful niece, who turns thirty years old today. I remember sitting with her mother in the hospital, waiting, waiting, waiting for her arrival. When I saw her for the first time I thought she was the most beautiful baby. Have loved her dearly ever since. Happy birthday, Haven. My how time flies.