I know a Well

Woke today with panic on my mind, and depression already setting in. Didn't sleep well last night, and after the Mr. left for the day, I fell asleep in my chair listening to my new YouTube play list. Didn't have much housework today, I did most of it yesterday, and it's still clean, so I was aimless when I woke up. I went out and looked at the garden, watered it, took a few pictures, and then this headache started in. By the time the Mr. got home the depression I have been battling for months was like a thick fog around me. I needed a cup of coffee but we had no creamer, except one tiny McDonald's creamer, and I wasn't sure it was still good. I took some Advil migraine, and lay down but it didn't help much, when I woke up it was less, but still there. I finally went down and made myself that cup of coffee and put that creamer in it and the headache went away. I then felt more energized that I had all day long, not because the headache was gone, but because of a realization I had during the morning. I had been listening to John Michael Talbot, a christian singer, but not just a Christian singer, he is a catholic monk, and a genius on the guitar. He runs a monastery in the Arkansas hills, and, yes, really walks around in monk robes and a long white beard. He looks a little like Gandalf. But his music is beautiful. Stunning. Soothing. He sings this song, "I know a well." Now this song is not even on my play list, but for some reason it is stuck in my head today. It is not even close to my favorite JMT song, but today it strikes a chord with me. As I lay there in my chair this morning, on the verge of sleep, with the words rattling around in my brain, I realize that not only do I know a well, I have a well. A secret place inside me to draw from, when I can't go on anymore. A place to draw strength from when I don't have any. When I have reached the end of me, and that depression rolls in like a smothering fog. A well put there by God himself, of bubbling, living water, for me to draw on, if only I will. Pardon the pun, if you will, but for me that is deep (LOL). I realize I have a tool that I have not been utilizing. That ability to reach down and draw what I need for the day. Oh, I wake up and pray, and have my quiet time, every day, and I am constantly before the Lord with my needs, and my emotions, which unfortunately are many, but this was different.  The next time I began to slide down into that panic mode, I remembered my earlier thoughts and I drew on that well. I closed my eyes, and allowed God to fill me to the brim from that secret place. The effect was immediate. No panic, no depression, peace rolled in. Sour face went away, Sadness gone. I had been dreading tomorrow, which is going to be long. But now I'm ready to face it. Bring it, I say. And that, my friends, is a miracle.