Amazing Love

I have to be honest. I spent most of my life from my late teens into my early middle age falling in and out of relationship with God. In my teen years I was very faithful. I couldn't imagine a life without God as pilot and I walked with Him daily.
In my late teen years something got in the way though. I would say it was boys but the deeper truth is it was self. I found out when I became an adult that I could do
anything I pleased and so I began to please myself all the time. Even during the times of my deepest faithlessness though, God showed Himself faithful. Every time I called He was there and I could still hear Him speak on occasion. One time I was riding my motorcycle on the way to a friend's house and I picked up a fairly large branch. I could hear it dragging under the frame of my bike and finally had to get off and pull it out. As I did I could hear the voice of God speaking to my faithless heart. "This branch you are dragging along is just like your sin" He said to me. (Boy was He right!)
A few months later I did something very unwise. I drove that motorcycle out into the country on a snowy day to visit with some friends that I knew I should not hang out with. When I got there nobody was home so I waited. There were no cell phones in those days so I couldn't call anyone. I just sat there until it started to get dark. What I didn't realize was that the roads had frozen over. When I finally came to my senses and got on my bike to go home I realized I couldn't drive. I tried. I went about a mile slipping and sliding on the ice and fell off in the ditch about a hundred times. So I was stuck out in the country on a darkening January day with no phone and no way to get home. My bike was stuck in the ditch. I couldn't get it out no matter how hard I tried. I was so cold even my tears were frozen on my face. I began to panic. Then I did the only sensible thing that entire day, and probably that entire year. My faithless self asked God for help. About a minute later, as I was still standing there, the headlights of a car came around the curve behind me and slowed down. But it wasn't just any car, it was an El Camino, a car with an open bed in the back for the bike. It couldn't have been better. He slowed and asked me if I wanted a lift. In any normal situation this would have been a huge NO. However I knew without a doubt that this was the answer to my prayer. I didn't hesitate. He was kind enough to get out and put the bike in the back for me and then drive me all the way home. I don't remember anything else about that whole ride except the unbelievable feeling that rose in my chest as I saw the answer to my prayers come around that corner. There was something deep, deep, deep within me that understood that God had been faithful to me even in my deepest faithlessness.
His love for me is absurd, over the top, wonderful, amazing. And I did nothing to earn it.

Lord, I spent years literally spinning my wheels, never going anywhere with You. I lived only for myself. I thank you for being faithful when I didn't deserve it.I acknowledge that it was your grace that saved me. I pray now for anybody else who is struggling in this area. You are an amazing, amazing God. Amen.