Pie-p-p-p-Pie-p-p-p-PIE PIE PIE!!!

I should be commended. I'm patting myself on the back right now, as a matter of fact.
I just spent two hours with a screaming raving ten year old who did not want to do her homework. She tried every single trick in the book to get out of it from trying to make me angry enough to send her to her room to telling me she wasn't going to do it, to telling me she wasn't coming back from the bathroom. She threw her pencil, she slammed the book, she got up and wandered around the room. It got nasty. Throughout it all I remained calm and adamant that she was going to do the work even if it took all night long.
I was sitting on my bed next to her when my best friend called. I started explaining to her what I was explaining to my daughter when the absurdity of it all caught up with me. I started laughing uncontrollably. (Which really ticked off my daughter even more).
Tyra, I said, how do you explain to a ten year old child with a math disability (esp. if you have one yourself) how to find out how many ounces in in a ton. How do you help her understand how much 500 ounces relates to in tons? Here's what I've been doing. I've been drawing...PIES. I've worked out a formula. It goes like this.
A pie is a Pie unless its a ton, or maybe a quarter of a ton. (said in a singsong rhythm). An ounce is an ounce is a quarter of an ounce, unless it's a quarter of a ton. A ton is a ton is a quarter of a ton, unless it's a quarter of an ounce.
A pie is a ton, is a quarter of an ounce, unless it's a quarter of a ton. About this time, we both broke down in hysterics. I'm singing the "Pie" song by Randy Stonehill, (pie-pa-pa-pie-papa-PIE PIE PIE!!!) She's laughing so hard I can't even understand what she's saying. Ally is ticked off, and screaming her head off in the background and all I can do is laugh.
It ended when I had to say good-PIE! Well, we kept trying to hang up but stayed on the phone laughing our fool heads off.
Finally we said good-pie for the final time, and Ally and I finished her work. She is in bed, and I am giving myself kudos for not losing my temper.